At the moment I think in newbies you get a great deal of support and you build your tribe around you. Its great support and an amazing opportunity to learn and to give.
Unique.
Stick with it as there are vets who can post to you to help you too. It's very early days to FB.
This seems to be about fins.
The house can be sold. If you paid bills and loans when he lived in the property then the likelihood is there is a gift whilst you were together. Since you moved out I think you can repudiate and notify that you consider part a debt which requires reimbursement.
What the ex proposes on fins seems awfully one sided to me. Your L will no doubt have sage advice on it.
Have a good old wallow in your misery. Eat chocolate and buckets of ice cream or whatever is your desire. Play sad movies and songs. It all helps. You deserve it and it's all part of recovery.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
At the moment I think in newbies you get a great deal of support and you build your tribe around you. Its great support and an amazing opportunity to learn and to give.
Unique.
Stick with it as there are vets who can post to you to help you too. It's very early days to FB.
Oh, we weren't going to leave! Just that we've had some unique experiences with stepfamilies and exwives who want to cause problems, so we wanted to chat about that off the site (it's not wholly applicable.)
Quote:
what the ex proposes on fins seems awfully one sided to me. Your L will no doubt have sage advice on it.
Yes. He's incapable of caring about anyone but himself right now. It's difficult to witness because he was always so caring.
And it's quite hurtful to know that he's going to try to make it ugly in order to justify leaving.
Quote:
Have a good old wallow in your misery. Eat chocolate and buckets of ice cream or whatever is your desire. Play sad movies and songs. It all helps. You deserve it and it's all part of recovery.
Yes, a breakdown is in order. Tears welling up as we speak.
Hurting for you, Cadence. It's hard enough to suspect that they are going to be mean and difficult, but harder still when they remove all doubt. We are here for you.
M-60 H-51 M-14 years BD 12/26/16 S 1/1/17
"First the pain, then the rising." Glennon Doyle Melton
This stuff can grind you down and create thought loops. Who knows what goes on in the waywards mind? They sure don't!
Waywards often justify their actions with deflation, projection and blame. Words are easy, words on D forms are largely unimportant until they are shown as lies or rhetoric. Lies on sworn legal forms which can be proved as lies reduce credibility.
I know this, courts are not stupid. They go for he said she said, and largely ignore the mud that's slung. That stuff needs evidence and most likely there isn't any in your WH docs. In essence rebuttal of lies is important. I have a friend who was accused by her WH of taking drugs, an unfit mother, in fact the opposite is true she is a dedicated and loving mother. She took a voluntary drug test as a rebuttal, not once but three times. Asked the court for him to take one. He refused, they ordered and he failed the test!
So start your own document collection, and know that waywards behaving in an entitled way always disclose their waywardness. It just needs calm on your part.
It hurts though and of course this is grief. Your D is moving fast as these things go. Take a breath and let things unfold in time.
As Cadet says you have time.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Update: H wants to know what my lawyer said and asked if I'd be willing to meet him tomorrow to go over the terms of his contract.
I really don't know how to feel about this.
First of all, why would I share what my lawyer said with him? (And I haven't heard back yet. I've got to call.)
Second, I'm not confused. Sitting down and going over terms isn't going to make me sign his document of magical thinking. Since he knows that at one point I wanted to save things, I wonder if he thinks if offering face time with him will have me so excited that I'll sign anything.
But I'm also wondering if this isn't a ploy to see me and temperature check. He's mentioned seeing me (for business reasons, of course) in both of his emails. And it will have been two weeks of almost absolute silence aside from his two emails and my one-sentence reply.
It may just be sinking in that he's not running the show and that's making him uncomfortable.
