I am overtaken with a lot of guilt and remorse at this moment. It is something I haven't felt as yet. Not to the depth I am currently. My conscience is extremely heavy. Those times I lost my temper at her where it wasn't her fault, the times I was overly critical about things around the home, the times I had a bad day at work and she was on the receiving end of it. I feel so ashamed at the way I was in those moments I can't really put in words. I should have been better. She deserved it. Her faults or mistakes are no excuse for my behaviour or actions. I can't even recall any of hers at the moment. Just owning up to mine. I can't bring back the past-I would do anything humanly possible to do so. But, I can't. All I can do is feel the present and work on these that will have no part in the NEW me. I hope and pray that she will have the same bout of reflection. Perhaps not now. But maybe in time. And her heart will soften. Maybe she is too foregone. And it is really 'too late'. But, I am cursed to be hopeful. Perhaps, until the bitter end.
Me:35 W:35 M:5 T:7 NO KIDS S: 3rd Nov 2016 to 4th Feb 2017 BD: 7th Mar 2017 GD: 6 weeks
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Friends, I have just received a message from my MIL. I haven't opened it as yet and I cannot see all of it on preview. It starts off as:
'Hi jbroken, how are you? Wanted to ask if you can check if to see if W left her...'
The last time I spoke with her was a month ago-the very next day after my W walked out. She basically reiterated everything my W said on the BD plus called it a 'bad marriage', etc. It was a ready scripted conversation. All blame firmly in my direction. She is definitely a 'biased shoulder/protector/rescuer/enabler' and has played a key role in getting my sitch to where it is - even though she makes it sound like this is solely my W decision.
The subject matter of the message is so perplexing. I mean asking me if my W actually left something behind! She disappeared like she never existed, with everything she felt she had a right to take - down to our wedding pictures!
Also, when my parents called my W to speak to her a couple of days after she didn't answer, call back or even reply to any messages they sent.
Any advice? Should I respond? What should I write back? How should I be?
Me:35 W:35 M:5 T:7 NO KIDS S: 3rd Nov 2016 to 4th Feb 2017 BD: 7th Mar 2017 GD: 6 weeks
Why can't you open the message? If it is text and you are worried about read receipts, turn them off first. I always think it is worse for someone to know you have seen something but are choosing not to respond.
It could be anything. Open it and find out and then you will know whether to respond.
I dont think you can harm your situation by answering a question for MIL. This is an opportunity to "act as if" everything is ok with you. Dont go overboard but let your care free attitude come through the text.
I would. Just be polite and courteous if you do. You don't want to be like your W lol, but just keep it short. What is the W looking for and why wouldn't she contact you about it?
M: 37 W: 36 T: 16 M: 11 D2: 8,3 PA: 2015 WAW: 2016 W Filed: 2017 2/07/2017 W officially dating OM2
Why can't you open the message? If it is text and you are worried about read receipts, turn them off first. I always think it is worse for someone to know you have seen something but are choosing not to respond.
Thanks OwnIt, good idea. I managed to do just that and open the message.
Originally Posted By: OwnIt
It could be anything. Open it and find out and then you will know whether to respond.
Well it reads: 'Hi jbroken, how are you? Wanted to ask if you can check to see if W left her driving licence in the flat - she said it might be in the coat she left behind the door, can you just check to see if it's there and let me know? X'
Me:35 W:35 M:5 T:7 NO KIDS S: 3rd Nov 2016 to 4th Feb 2017 BD: 7th Mar 2017 GD: 6 weeks
I dont think you can harm your situation by answering a question for MIL. This is an opportunity to "act as if" everything is ok with you. Dont go overboard but let your care free attitude come through the text.
Just my opinion.
Thanks Thornton, though I'm not sure how to put out 'act as if' in response to MIL. She wrote: 'Hi jbroken, how are you? Wanted to ask if you can check to see if W left her driving licence in the flat - she said it might be in the coat she left behind the door, can you just check to see if it's there and let me know? X'
Any suggestions welcome
Me:35 W:35 M:5 T:7 NO KIDS S: 3rd Nov 2016 to 4th Feb 2017 BD: 7th Mar 2017 GD: 6 weeks
