annab74 - amazing advice. As a matter of fact, I just sent a text to wife claiming that i am not mad, angry, upset, I just want her to be happy with whatever choice she makes. And honestly, I do (hopefully with me), but probably wont be. Continue to work on me and let it play out as it may.
Me: 38 Her: 33 Bomb: 1/6/2017 Separated: 1/10/17 Together: 16 Years Son 12 Years Old She and Son still at the house Divorce Filed/Retracted Multiple Times Divorce: scheduled to be final 6/20/17
annab74 - out of curiosity, from the time of the bomb/separation or whatever it was, to the almost completion of the divorce to him stopping it, how much time lapsed?
Me: 38 Her: 33 Bomb: 1/6/2017 Separated: 1/10/17 Together: 16 Years Son 12 Years Old She and Son still at the house Divorce Filed/Retracted Multiple Times Divorce: scheduled to be final 6/20/17
As for me, we separated for a year before he filed for D. Although he had been determined to file, he turned very wishy washy as soon as the process was set in motion and started saying he didn't know what he wanted. After stalling the process for almost two months, he started telling me he wanted to come home. So altogether, it was just over a year and a half from when he left till when he started talking about reconciliation.
Best thing you can do is work on yourself. As doodler said, she is involved with someone else. Period. Now, she may/may not come back sometime in the future, but are you going to live on a what-if?
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
A personal anecdote: my H filed for D and things went all the way to the judges final signing before H pulled the case and asked to reconcile. One of the things he told me after the fact was how much my support of him had meant rather than my trying to force him to stop the D.
Don't give up hope. Sometimes even the worst of situations can turn around. Lead with your love rather than your fear.
Anna - Always nice to hear stories like yours. My W and I actually filed 4 years ago only to pull D off the table about 2 weeks into the waiting period. She asked me what would we have done had it gone through and I told her it's just a piece of paper. She had a look of amazement in her eyes.
Too bad we slipped and I don't know where we'll go this time, but always encouraging to hear these stories.
Trying
Me 42, Wife 39; Married 16; Together 17; Kids: D13, S10 Wife asks for Divorce: 03/19/13 Reconcile: 07/07/13 Round 2 Starts: 02/19/17 Apartment Life: 04/21/17 PA Confirmed: 05/23/17
Also, should I give my wedding ring back to her? If so, how/when?
Me: 38 Her: 33 Bomb: 1/6/2017 Separated: 1/10/17 Together: 16 Years Son 12 Years Old She and Son still at the house Divorce Filed/Retracted Multiple Times Divorce: scheduled to be final 6/20/17
Hi Trying...thank you for the kind words. I don't want to totally hijack Sellout's thread, so I'll pop over to yours to catch up with what's going on and say hi there.
Also, should I give my wedding ring back to her? If so, how/when?
Why? Keep it for whatever reason you think you need. Sell it and buy yourself a beer.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
I cancelled. I made up a long reason, but I cancelled. I feel at peace with it.
Its very odd to me that you are having these up and down moments with W. Youve now scheduled two meetings and abruptly ended or cancelled both. How can you work to portray stability acting like this? How can you be more consistent in your actions?
