Status Unknown

[LW2381]

Ok, Update time. Need advice, badly.

Just to catch up....I have been posting more pictures of myself w/ S lately on social media (I'm not normally a big poster.). I have been extremely happy and seemed very "as if" lately with her. I let her know I was here for her, but I (like I said in earlier posts) I am not riding her emotional roller coaster. She called today, to let me know that all of the posts and the way I was acting seemed like I was trying to hurt her. She said "something's different", so she noticed my 180's. However, she replied "it's like I have tried really hard and you just don't care if I walk away." I validated again, and explained that "I had some realizations and that I had come to grips with some things. She asked "like what". I replied that I am here and love her, but that nothing I say or do will change her mind about staying or going, that's on her. That I wasn't going to force it any more, and that she knows what I want, but I can only control me." She says that "I shut her out" and she feels like "you don't want me." I validated, yet again, and told her that "i want you, but I don't NEED you. I will be fine whether you stay or go."

This whole time, she will never say whether she wants me or not. She also always replies "that is always the focus with you, why can't I just work through this?" Which I don't get because when I tried R talks, she felt "pressured." When I backed off, she felt like I didn't want her.

Regardless, she invited me to a family dinner (with a begrudging tone), and I politely declined and said I was going to have dinner by myself. She said okay, "I'm going out after family dinner." I said okay, have fun.

Needless to say this goes on from here, she says "I am going to get some stuff and leave, and you can pick up S tomorrow, to spend time with him." I said okay, no problem, "at least I know how you feel." She says, "I'm done. I'm leaving." I said okay, let's meet to discuss logistics of this.

She's says, "I'll come home tonight, and we can discuss." I said "okay" and that is where we left it.

I just feel like things spiraled out of control, and she claims i wouldn't let her discuss her feelings.

What do I do, how do I handle, I was feeling really good about where I stood. I was confident and now I feel crushed. Was she temp checking, did she really hope to have a R talk?

Advice, Feedback please!