Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 9

[Sotto]

Sara my lovely - one last question from me to ask yourself...

At what point does your H's behaviour become so disrespectful and inappropriate that the steel trap door comes thumping down?

I'm reminded of a couple of situations - one, where my XH booked a flight to visit OW (and I told him if he decided to go, I would not be 'at home' when he got back. He did go and I left as a result.) Caliguy's - where he and his W were piecing when he found she had texted explicit photos to OM.

In both situations the door came thumping straight down. No big discussions or arguments, no gas lighting. For me, I knew (with every fibre of my being) that we could not live together if he was behaving in this way.

At what point might you come to feel the same. And what part is fear (of abandonment?) playing for you? From all that you post, it does sound as though your H thinks he can get away with poor behaviour (illustrated by the smiley emoticon?) Meanwhile, you are doing your best to attract him back by planning nice things, buying nice nighties and buying him big presents. As though he and living with him in this way is some kind of prize?

Sorry, that was more than one question and I am feeling cross and upset on your behalf this morning - so that's mine to own too - but I hope there is something of help in all of this for you - truly I don't want to add to your pain...

Xx