Thank you OwnIt! I didn't know your D is an opera singer! Wow! I have always been so amazed by their beautiful voices.
There has been a different feeling settling over me the last few days. It is difficult for me to describe. Perhaps its acceptance, maybe with some ambivalence thrown in, sprinkled with sadness. I feel like I'm letting go more and more.
Not having the answers to my questions has been a big part of my hang up. Not knowing what is true and what is a lie has also been a big issue. I think I am coming around to accepting that he can't or won't give me answers. Moreover, even if he did, I would need corroboration to believe him. I will just have to live with the uncomfortable feeling of never knowing some things. Laying these things down and just walking away from them is a difficult journey. But that is all I can really do. There is nothing I can do to get the answers.
S was ill on Monday. Fortunately, it was a work holiday for me so we just stayed home. He seemed better and I was going to send him to daycare yesterday, but when my mom found out she insisted on watching him. He is doing better so he went to daycare today.
H had a paper at school due last night so for the last few days he has been diligently working on it. It's been nice because it has limited our interaction.
One of H's older sisters is coming to town tomorrow. This should be interesting. My plan is to sit back and let him take the lead with regard to entertaining her. Afterall, she's HIS sister so it's his responsibility. Normally, I would contact any houseguest and find out what I should have on hand for breakfast, drinks, snacks, etc. to make their stay more comfortable. I would also arrange an itinerary of fun things to do. But I don't think I am going to do this since it his family. Or am I looking at this wrong? And should I tell him I am not going to do this?
