Wife left two days before our anniversary! Part 2

[jbroken]

So you reckon all this is to push me to make a move i.e. to serve first? I can't say that hasn't come to mind.

I'm sticking to the advice I've received from folks here - GD and NC. I believe part of that is keeping things normal and as is for e.g. on social media? Let her make the moves and play games? Or am I mistaken?

[MoveFrwd]

So the W changes her profile picture this morning on FB. Looking fantastic. I'm so sad and disappointed how all this has not affected her at all. To not even care how parading yourself around all happy and doing so well - in 3 weeks that too - would hurt me and my family. How forgone and hard-hearted do you have to be to have no shame or compassion for another's pain.

I don't think anyone who loves you or ever did can be so cruel.

Seriously? She posted a picture of herself on facebook. Its not like shes going to post a picture of herself crying into a tub of ice cream. People put what they want to world to see of them on FB.

Unfollow her and move forward with your life. I see this as a non-event. It by no means seems cruel or an attack on you or your family.

Think of it like this: To her, you were the source of all of her unhappiness, all of her problems. Now that she is free from you, she sure as heck had better be happy to make it worth all of the trouble/effort of leaving you. She likely isnt going to see after 3 weeks that the grass isnt greener. This will take time. Youre going to have to dig deep for patience you never knew you had. Get her feed out of your feed and you wont have to subject yourself to her posts.

[MoveFrwd]

I believe part of that is keeping things normal and as is for e.g. on social media? Let her make the moves and play games? Or am I mistaken?

I never bothered to unfriend my ex. But I did unfollow so I didnt have to see any of the pictures or things that got posted.

[leahsue]

Unfollow her even if you can't bring yourself to unfriend her. No good can come out of you seeing her "happy" photos on social media. None. None.

[Dawgs]

^Bingo

[Sunmoon]

so sorry. I feel your pain. that hope that you speak of that is dying...I feel it here too. I've decided to let go, as much as I can, while still living with him. It's torture. we had a conversation last night and I had to hear those heart wrenching words from him once again, the "I'm confused and I don't have feelings for you right now" line. ouch. ouch. ouch. At a certain degree, I'm almost jealous that you can at least be away from her at this point, I know that sounds really bad. I am debating leaving, staying with my sisters for a few days, to let him sit with his feelings. He understands my pain - and every time I tried telling him or throwing out the phrase "i Just don't know" he would say "what do you mean you don't know?" almost like he was scared that I am getting to end of my rope with all this. he said he has been doing a little bit of reading on his end, and he did set up a counseling appointment for just himself with our therapist. He said he doesn't know how to reconnect with me. I threw out a bunch of ways, he still didn't seem receptive. so I give up. he's gonna have to come to me on his own accord, I need to take care of myself at this point.

Hang in there Jbroken, I'm rooting for you over here in the USA...there is always light after the darkness. You will get through this.

[jbroken]

I believe part of that is keeping things normal and as is for e.g. on social media? Let her make the moves and play games? Or am I mistaken?

I never bothered to unfriend my ex. But I did unfollow so I didnt have to see any of the pictures or things that got posted.

I will unfollow her that's for sure.

[jbroken]

Unfollow her even if you can't bring yourself to unfriend her. No good can come out of you seeing her "happy" photos on social media. None. None.

Unfriending would show her that I'm bothered - well I am of course but she doesn't know that does she? Besides wouldn't that be sort of a door slam and counter productive to the sitch?

Definitely not following her - that's for sure.

[jbroken]

so sorry. I feel your pain. that hope that you speak of that is dying...I feel it here too. I've decided to let go, as much as I can, while still living with him. It's torture. we had a conversation last night and I had to hear those heart wrenching words from him once again, the "I'm confused and I don't have feelings for you right now" line. ouch. ouch. ouch. At a certain degree, I'm almost jealous that you can at least be away from her at this point, I know that sounds really bad. I am debating leaving, staying with my sisters for a few days, to let him sit with his feelings. He understands my pain - and every time I tried telling him or throwing out the phrase "i Just don't know" he would say "what do you mean you don't know?" almost like he was scared that I am getting to end of my rope with all this. he said he has been doing a little bit of reading on his end, and he did set up a counseling appointment for just himself with our therapist. He said he doesn't know how to reconnect with me. I threw out a bunch of ways, he still didn't seem receptive. so I give up. he's gonna have to come to me on his own accord, I need to take care of myself at this point.

Sorry to hear on how things are moving for you. But, I do feel you are making the right moves for this phase in your sitch.

Hang in there Jbroken, I'm rooting for you over here in the USA...there is always light after the darkness. You will get through this.

I know I will get through this - I just can't see the destination. Read a quote by Rumi today that touched my heart 'Through love, all pain will turn to medicine.'

[Bdog37]

Mine deleted all of my family and friends form her FB and changed her name (took off my last name). At first, I was kinda mad, but you got to let go at some point.

Unfollow her and don't worry about what she is posting. Will do you no good to see those things.