Thread #3 - Mediation

[Gordie]

Just got an email from the wife about her moving out.

"We need to discuss what all I can take, what I need to buy (and how to handle that), etc. Didn't know if you had any thoughts. I had some general ideas. We could maybe talk after the mediator on April 7 if you weren't in a huge rush to get to work. We can also just go through it by email."

I need to figure out the best approach to this. I'm not sure i really care what she takes, other than i don't want to deal with buying new stuff. Do I just let her take whatever she wants? Or, do I use this as an opportunity to talk through things with her and show her that I'm a reasonable person who she can talk to?

While i really don't care what she takes, i'm leaning towards using this as a constructive conversation to show her that she has a voice and that i'm not the bad guy she thinks I am (and throw in some 180)s. Not necessarily to win her back, but to help make our future interactions more bearable.

Will this be an emotional conversation with you? If so, I'd do some advance preparation and write down a list from each room, things you definitely want...then if she asks for it, you aren't surprised and/or emotional.