WW wife turned WA what to do? Sandi2 anyone?

[25yearsmlc]

25years-

I have spending all my spare time at the gym, taking the children to activities and being with friends. Starting Judo lessons this week.

I did say to her that I didn't think this situation was about an affair but about 2 people making some mistakes and not knowing how tonhave a healthy relationship. I told her to me it isnt about the affair, and I honestly believe that. Not that I am making an wxcuse for her, but I see the big picture. To her its more work to fix than tongive up. But Inthink that is where the doubt is setting in.

That is why you need to make the most of the time you two are together by NOT engaging in conflict.


I don't ever initiate end game talk. Its all her and her need to amputate the pain. Im patient but I feel like just telling her that Inagree with her wanting me to give her the easy way out is irresponsible.

Why can't you simply leave it to lawyers? Or agree to table it and that you'll ponder her comments and then move on to a neutral topic?

Why must you draw your line in the sand in front of her? If your L knows what you want, there's not really a need for you to discuss it in person, is there? I don't see it.


I am protecting myself.

You should protect yourself. IF you read my first post to you again, I think you'll see that all I'm suggesting is that you let your advocate, do the advocating for you.

And that you engage in co-parenting with your wife, and maybe friendly banter or friendship or build on whatever you feel is safe ground.

The idea of whether to forgive her or why she had the affair or what your role is in this,

isn't something to discuss with her right now. You CAN say that if you had it all to do again, there are lots of things you'd do differently.

And leave it at that. UNTIL IF AND WHEN she shows interest in more, the rest of this seems like borrowing trouble.

Just my take on it.

Hang in there.