H told me while he was gone that he didn't think I could ever see past this, that he thought he ruined everything, and that I could never forgive him. When I think about all the times he said that, it reminds me that when he made the choice to leave, he did so knowing (thinking) he would never get me back. And he still left. I think in some ways he ended it a long time ago and that I just am waiting to fully accept it.
This is hard BluWave and I feel for you. I wish you peace in dealing with this. Sometimes I feel like they say this to force closure like "won't you just give up so we can both move on". It's not that easy.
Keep in mind, he still left because of his weakness in dealing with your M. It's about his capability to handle the struggles of your M or lack there of to resort to his behavior and choosing to leave and not complete choice of abandoning your M. Does that make sense?
Be well.
Me 42, Wife 39; Married 16; Together 17; Kids: D13, S10 Wife asks for Divorce: 03/19/13 Reconcile: 07/07/13 Round 2 Starts: 02/19/17 Apartment Life: 04/21/17 PA Confirmed: 05/23/17
