jbroken, I am sorry this has thrown you into such a tailspin. I have been off in melancholy land and am returning to the land of the living. One thing I found on my adventure there was that my penchant for mind-reading is driving me literally insane and getting me nowhere. Read BluWave's latest set of posts on what she learned from her H about what she thought and what was really going on. Leave the mind-reading to the palm readers and crystal ball gazers.
Now, on to that text. I used to play the game about how long should I wait to open and read. My H still does. He did it to me yesterday. But that is what it is, a game. Doesn't a normal person in a normal situation get a text, read it and respond. Don't you want her to see you as a normal person. I don't think delay here is bad. This was a major bad tragic event. Sometimes people just need some time. Do what feels right for you. There is a big difference between initiating contact and responding to contact.
The friends thing is interesting. In the last few years my H began to comment about why I didn't have more friends, why we didn't have mutual friends, etc. I think he was adding that to his list of justifications for how I am flawed or our relationship was flawed. Make friends for you. Friendship isn't something you can fake. There are a lot of great introverts in this world who have accomplished amazing things. Read the book Quiet (it will give you something to do instead of thinking about her so much).
