Let's take a breath here-- I know that you have been moving in this direction and we were discussing boundaries to make a shift in the sitch. Did you push the fast forward button on me? I thought you were going to wait until you went to MC before you made any "final" decisions? Was I mistaken on this? I'm not saying you shouldn't give him the letter, I'm just trying to keep up (as usual).
The letter looks like an ultimatum. (I know we talked about this too) but it just seems to say either/or and not in the reflection of I'm willing to take these steps in order to keep us on track, are you willing to do this or not? And for you to have to clarify that it's not an ultimatum, sends the message to me that he will interpret it this way as well. Could you revise it to some extent to say that if he's "in the game, HE will not put the subject on the back burner and will begin to address/face what's in front of him. With your assistance (if he would like), we could begin by going to MC?" and if he's not in the game than he needs to definitevly let you know by verbalizing it? (does this change the letter any?) I'm not sure if I'm getting my point accross here but I just feel it is a strong letter w/the decision being box A or box B. And knowing his logical engineer mind, he will have to choose. Thus-an ultimatum. Can we tone the letter down to let him know that these are your feelings and you are at the end (as you told him) of trying and leave it at that? or is that too loose for you?
I know what you're trying to do here. It's what I did last week. Put it in his lap so he can "say" it one way or another but I'm still seeing ultimatum which is not pretty especially for the WAS. Just some thoughts, Bets. I trust your judgement but wanted to share. Tootles...
