Right there with you. And add in 15+ faked trips to the counselor (make that two different MCs)..
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
My initial reaction -- and it went on far too long -- was to extrapolate from my STBX's willingness to give up half of her kids' remaining childhoods the truth (but it wasn't that) that I must be utterly horrible to be with. How else to explain a mother making that trade off? What I see now, htough, is a woman who simply got to her early 40s and decided her life -- looking back on it -- won't have been exciting enough or meaningful enough if she doesn't blow up what is and create a new identity. And it really helps detach. That sort of thinking is about as unattractive as you could blueprint in another human being as far as I'm concerned.
Me: 46 W: 44 Married: 17 Together 21 D13; S10 BD: 03.03.15 (Not attracted to you) Almost 2 years trying, alone, to save marriage Status now: Divorced (effective 06.13.17)
How else to explain a mother making that trade off? What I see now, htough, is a woman who simply got to her early 40s and decided her life -- looking back on it -- won't have been exciting enough or meaningful enough if she doesn't blow up what is and create a new identity
It is sucktastic no matter how you look at it. Mine went as far to say that the kids would be better off.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
I think many of us go through the stage of blaming ourselves for not being the husbands we should've been. We get lost in our own fog. In hindsight, I was a good husband. Could I have been better? Absolutely! But, I was a good husband and an awesome dad. It's just that my XW wanted the OM and his family more than her own family.
Yep. Its crazy how most want to blame the OM. It's not the OM's fault by any means...he was just the vessel. There is no difference in the two. Our spouses aren't victims of conniving OMs. They went looking...an affair isn't an oops thing. They wanted it - whether it be with their partner or someone else. To them, their marriage and spouse are less than nothing. Sorry to be so blunt, but it is what it is.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
I am into my third year now of suffering pretty significantly (getting better, though!), and I didn't even have to deal with an OM. I really feel for you guys and for all of the LBS here who've had to deal with infidelity.
Me: 46 W: 44 Married: 17 Together 21 D13; S10 BD: 03.03.15 (Not attracted to you) Almost 2 years trying, alone, to save marriage Status now: Divorced (effective 06.13.17)
I really feel for you guys and for all of the LBS here who've had to deal with infidelity.
The OM stuff isn't so bad; it's just the particular OM my wife chose. The guy has man-b00bs so big that he needs a bra and he can't count to 20 without using all of his fingers and toes. I was replaced with that?
I really feel for you guys and for all of the LBS here who've had to deal with infidelity.
The OM stuff isn't so bad; it's just the particular OM my wife chose. The guy has man-b00bs so big that he needs a bra and he can't count to 20 without using all of his fingers and toes. I was replaced with that?
Ouch!
M:39 W:36 - D1:2 D2:6 11/19/16 BD1: ILYBNILWY, EA/PA Dec/Jan: MC, pursuing, not DBing 1/11/17 BD2: W wants 1 month break 2/1/17: Divorce Remedy. Start DBing 2/17/17 BD3: W - separation to start D process
I am into my third year now of suffering pretty significantly (getting better, though!), and I didn't even have to deal with an OM. I really feel for you guys and for all of the LBS here who've had to deal with infidelity.
Man if you only knew what lengths a cheater goes through.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
I really feel for you guys and for all of the LBS here who've had to deal with infidelity.
The OM stuff isn't so bad; it's just the particular OM my wife chose. The guy has man-b00bs so big that he needs a bra and he can't count to 20 without using all of his fingers and toes. I was replaced with that?
Holy hell. In my case, the OM was in identical shape and roughly the same size...he just had no hair and looked like a criminal (fits the mold)
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
