Weekly and bi-weekly music gigs Training for 8K on 4/30 Monthly movie podcast S8 Flag Football begins on Saturday (I'm assistant coach!) Volunteering to help with RE classes at church Six Flags opens April 1st (we have season passes)
Last week S8 and I went skiing. It was the PERFECT day. The mountain had just gotten about 18" of new snow 2 days before we went. We stayed at a resort that had a huge indoor waterpark. So it was 48+ hours of father/son bonding... and we BOTH needed it!
As far as my W goes, not much has changed. There have been no more R discussions since she told me she wanted to move forward with separation last week. I have an appt on Friday to get some legal advice.
I'm still making every attempt to reconnect with my W and she's been a bit more obstinate lately. I haven't pursued her romantically in any way, just friendly conversations, being helpful, and occasionally asking for us to do fun things together (to which she almost always rejects me).
I know that she's very aware of the changes I've been making and I'm sure this is causing a conflict for her. Not only am I starting to resemble that guy she fell in love with 12 years ago, but I'm actually improving way beyond that guy. And I can only imagine how this must make her feel:
"Why didn't he do this before? Why does it take the threat of divorce for him to make these changes? These changes will never stick, he'll revert back to his old ways eventually. He's just trying to manipulate me."
Unfortunately, no amount of discussion will help with this. The only way I can resolve these issues in her mind is to be consistent. And of course, the irony is that the more consistent I am with my new behaviors, the less I care if she notices, and the more I feel as if I am making these changes for myself.
When I first came to these boards and read about "detachment" I thought I understood what it meant. But in reality, I wasn't ready to detach. And frankly, I'm still not all the way there. But I'm starting to understand it more.
M46 W48 M11 T14 S11 D8 BD: 2016/05/27 In-home separation: 2016/11/23 Nesting: 2017/06/11 W moves out: 2018/01/07 W goes public with OM: 2018/07/12 I ask for a divorce: 2018/12/14
