Wading through. I think I'm dealing with a MLC.

[leahsue]

Cadence,
I can so totally identify with your situation! My H turns 50 this summer. He, too, has always been a hands-on, attentive, loving partner who seemed to adore me. We ALSO were the couple who sat on the same side of a booth together. We are both divorced with now grown children, but reading your thoughts about his teenagers and the whole divorced dad/no responsibilities in the home/this is your vacation (my words, not yours-but I think you will get it) resonated with me so strongly. We went through all of that, even down to the crazy ex-wife who as recently as 2 years ago threw a drunken fit at our son's wedding reception about us dancing (and we've been married 13 YEARS!). So I HEAR YOU SISTER. But, back to the men.... if you'll go back and read my thread you'll see that my story really parallels yours in so many ways. I reacted very badly to his news and I did all the things they say not to do. I don't have any advice for you, because you seem to have a real handle on the whole detaching/180 thing, and I'd say keep that up. After 3 months of silence, coldness, and abandonment from my H, he has started to communicate recently and wants us to meet for a weekend, but I will say that I don't think that would have happened had I not implemented the principles found here. I don't know where we are headed, and in fact there was a set-back (at least for me) this past weekend as far as what I hope for our future, but I'm trying to step back to where I was before he began to contact me, and continue to make a life for myself without him. It's hard especially this week, because now I have the flu, which makes me feel very alone and vulnerable and sad. Keep hanging in there, post often, maybe you will get more responses and help than I have been able to- with the exception of my faithful friend Jeep, most of my cries for support on here go unnoticed. I've tried getting on others' posts and just offering some encouragement, and reading others' stories and struggles always helps me keep my own in perspective. I'm pulling for you!