I understand. It's often difficult to know what really happened because memories are repressed and confused, and sometimes, purposely misrepresented (a euphemism).
It seems like most child abusers have a partner; it may be a passive partner, but a partner nevertheless. The passive partner(s) tend to know what's going on, but they make excuses and look the other way and make it easy for the abuser to carry on the abuse. That's as hateful as the actual abuse.
