Hey FG, just dropping into your new thread over here after a bit of an absence on my part. I hear what you are saying about it being strange with W not in the picture, but it did make me smile when you mentioned the kids smiling and normal in your new home. It's rough right now, but you are doing an amazing job of being there for the kids. Keep it up and stay strong brother.
Me39 M11 : T13 D9 BD 5/31/16 In House S until 6/21/17 Divorced 10/5/18
I'm spending less and less time on DB. Maybe this is the real sign of detaching, and all up to the divorce was just me imagining detaching? I don't know.
I will try to check in on your now & again. I hope things turn out good for you man. You've been through the wringer.
BTW, I'm on TW w/ Jeep et al ...
-FG
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
It very well could be my friend. I think you may be right that we believe detachment is happening but in reality we are still subject to our Ws behavior so long as they are around. Maybe the detachment really comes once that last thread of in house S is cut. Out of sight, out of mind maybe.
You sir have been a rock for me around here and I hope you know how much it's been appreciated. Your strength IS your strength brother. You are a strong dude and are one hell of a dad. Your kids are going to grow up and look back on how you weathered this storm and be thankful for you. I've no doubt they will flourish with you in your new home.
Appreciate the thoughts too FG. Still grinding on this end but I'm fairly certain of the ending. I think it's more a question of how the last leg of the journey plays out. You're right about the wringer, I think you, JR, and myself have all gotten beaten up by it since we got here. Seeing both of y'all prosper on the other side helps though.
All that said, I signed up for TW but have no clue how to find y'all. Keep an eye out for me stumbling around there! Stay strong brother!
Me39 M11 : T13 D9 BD 5/31/16 In House S until 6/21/17 Divorced 10/5/18
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Friends who are aware that my XW and I were divorcing over a whole year ... that I hadn't touched her (sexually/romantically) for nearly a year ... are like, Yeah, it's time to go out and date!
Friends who aren't so aware, who just know about the big D happening this year, are like, What? Date? Already? Isn't it kind of early?
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
Friends who aren't so aware, who just know about the big D happening this year, are like, What? Date? Already? Isn't it kind of early?
Friends try to help in the only way they know, so to them it may seem early, when to you it isn't. They don't know the whole situation, and quite frankly, it isn't any of their business what happens. Sure, at some point they will find out, but it isn't up to you to justify your actions to them.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
Friends who are aware that my XW and I were divorcing over a whole year ... that I hadn't touched her (sexually/romantically) for nearly a year ... are like, Yeah, it's time to go out and date!
Friends who aren't so aware, who just know about the big D happening this year, are like, What? Date? Already? Isn't it kind of early?
And when they say go out and date...are they setting you up with any friendly ladies?
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
Friends who are aware that my XW and I were divorcing over a whole year ... that I hadn't touched her (sexually/romantically) for nearly a year ... are like, Yeah, it's time to go out and date!
Friends who aren't so aware, who just know about the big D happening this year, are like, What? Date? Already? Isn't it kind of early?
And when they say go out and date...are they setting you up with any friendly ladies?
Good point gordie! Seems like a requirement if someone is going to give you that kind of advice!
Me39 M11 : T13 D9 BD 5/31/16 In House S until 6/21/17 Divorced 10/5/18
Yep. Go to a bookstore. Or maybe something linked to your hobbies where you have common interests. It's a lot easier than one thinks...
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
