Wife with Neighbor Across the Street

[sellout]

Ok, so it’s been about 3 weeks and wanted to provide update, details and get some opinions. She is still seeing OM and now completely open about it. She stays at his house on some nights and I am still living in my own apartment a few miles away. She has openly admitted to having unprotected sex with him and she is not on birth control. This is highly out of character for her because she is VERY health conscience. We have been talking less and less and basically just through text for coordination purposes for our son. A few nights ago out of nowhere she texted me song lyrics (of “our” songs) and said she misses me. She went on to say that she is soooo depressed, confused, conflicted and that she broke down tonight and balled and cried in the bed for hours. I said the same and she ended the texting with “I love you”. Of course the next day things went back to normal where I’m angry about her still seeing the OM, etc… and the next couple of days were up/down. Then it got so bad and I couldn’t handle it anymore that I went and re-filed the divorce papers yesterday morning and texted her images of the paperwork showing her that I court date is scheduled for 4/7/17. She texted me back immediately saying “I hope you’re happy”. My response was “not yet, but I will be”. No communication throughout the day and at 7:30 last night I get a text out of the blue asking if I was busy and if not, would I go to dinner with her? I agreed and went to dinner thinking she was going to have a change of heart, tell me she dropped the OM and let’s work it out. Nope! She wanted to just “talk” caused she misses me and the “the only things we have talked about for the past 2.5 months is the situation”. I again for the millionth time told her I have no desire to have dinner with her, talk to her, etc. under the pretense that she is still seeing OM. The dinner lasted for about 30 min and then I left somewhat abruptly saying I was done and please don’t pull a “stunt” like this again. We texted a little afterwards and she said she just misses me but she is still 50/50 on if she wants to save marriage or stick with OM (causes he treats her like she deserves to be treated). She says, “what if I she decides to work on the marriage and it doesn’t work out”, then she has lost the OM too. She claims she is in a lose/lose situation. Some back and forth text in the middle of the night and finally I got so fed up with it this morning that my last text to her was to inform her that I am blocking her # and I will not accept any more calls/texts (which I did about 2 hours ago). I told her the next time we talk will be in court. So basically the last week she has started to show emotion over this whole thing and admits she is depressed and doesn’t know what she wants to do vs 100% wanting to get a divorce. To me, her not knowing and continuing the relations with OM is making her choice. I can’t/won’t stick around and be her doormat as bad as it hurts. Am I looking at this wrong? Until 2 hours ago Ive don’t a poor job of detaching including agreeing to meet her for dinner last night. My though was that if I didn’t meet her on her request I could be losing out on one of the last opportunities that possibly existing. When leaving she wanted to engage in a long romantic hug (which I declined) and she was upset saying, “you should hug me, it could be the last time we hug”. As of now, her calls/texts are blocked. If she really wants to, she can call/text from our sons phone or email me. What to do????