First time post feeling lost and confused

[Coconut]

Do dog... I am impressed with your strength, I personally think your doing great staying away from her to get yourself straight...

Your absolutely right that staying away from kids for 12 days isn't going to hurt them.. Find your strength, go on your work trip, then go home and be there for your children...

Don't kid yourself about your pros and cons list about staying with her, your kids are reason enough to give every effort to saving your marriage, and you need to try. But you don't need to give yourself up to do so, she's going to have the most work to do to save the M, for now you just need to remain strong and validate her feelings about your issues, don't have to agree, but they are her feelings so they are real.