WH came back. Piecing. Almost at 2 year mark.

[25yearsmlc]

Blu

I lack the time for a proper reply. I just wanted to echo that Retrovaille was the single best thing we did in "piecing". Without it, our recon would not have lasted this long.

And I would not have felt safe.

Another workshop that's aimed at individual's personal growth, is Essential Experience, aka 'EE". (It's in Philadelphia, however.)

It's experiential, not so much lectures. So that means it's helpful in reaching your real feelings, as you don't have time to rehearse or edit your responses. It was like 2 years of therapy in a long weekend. I found it to be the most profound inward search I've ever taken.
Regular weekly counseling gets interrupted after an hour, b/c you have to return to work or pick up the kids, etc. That gets fragmented. So either Retrovaille or EE would give you a jump start on the whole process of making a m work for both. You identify issues and come up with an action plan for resolving them.

H and I did EE in the late 1980's and it really brought us closer. H said EE was "more efficient" than weekly therapy. BTW, I attended EE for childhood baggage I wanted to ditch, and how it affected my work, etc. I did not attend EE for working on my m, then. But afterwards it so dramatically improved our interactions, that H went on his own 6 months later. Then we went together. Very bonding.

Of course like anything, if you don't keep it up, you can and will backslide.


(Oh and with EE, you don't have to go together, if child care is an issue. )

More later...