Came home, stuck in my head all day. Sold the junk car. Started thinking that she probably has taken the phone off my account. Found out she has. This hurt so much. I felt so gutted, still do. Just being purged from her life after such a short period of time like I'm part of her wardrobe.
Talked to my friend who's now coming back Wednesday night because of the storm. He's setting up the meeting with her she asked for. Going to ask her her side, hope she vents and opens up. He's bringing a letter his ex-fiance sent him saying that ending their relationship was her biggest regret in life because she projected her issues onto the relationship. I'm not telling him to do it, he wants to. He introduced us, was the best man at the wedding. He thinks that she is making a mistake and wants her to know that separation, divorce, doesn't have a happier ending.
If you are together for as long as we have been, ILYB isn't enough of a reason to leave and run away. There's always more options. Those feelings of "in love" are being crushed by the cruddy time we've had lately and a couple of fixable issues like our jobs and time spent together. To let herself turn these into resentment and refuse to work on it shows that she can't be happy in any long term relationship. I am working on me, trying my best to push through. I've found myself stronger than I ever imagined and happier with my life when I am able to detach even the slightest.
The only thing missing is her.
I can't chase, I can't shake her and tell her she's not seeing things how they really are, I can't get angry at her. I admire her bravery for doing this and abhor her stupidity for thinking it would actually help. I know how stubborn she is on her decisions, but I also know that shes capable of saying she was wrong. This push pull is unbearable in my head. Just can't detach, too many hours in the day.
Together 7 years Married 3 Said she was taking long way home late January Left to get some space 2/19/17 BD 3/1/17 ILYB
