I know I sound like a WAS and I do think I am closer to that than to a LBS, however I know better than that. Even if I wanted to pick up and leave (or kick him out), I wouldn't do that. He is my H and he is my family. We owe it to family to try and understand, tolerate and forgive. I want to do what is best for everyone in this sitch, especially the kids. That year we were separated was hard on everyone. Plus, I'm a smart gal, and I know the grass isn't greener.
What would my advise be to H pre-BD to make the M work? Gah! That's a hard question because when I think back to pre-A, even though life was hard, we were still so close! Was I a fool? Starting to wonder.
But what would I tell him? (And what should I tell myself)
M is hard and it will always change. We have to have patience with one another and with ourselves. Sometimes space is healthy and good. Don't do things that you will regret, need to hide, or that you cannot feel proud of. Being right isn't better than understanding. Go easy on yourself and let things go. Do and treat others as you want to be treated. In time, everything will work out if you believe in yourself.
That was hard! Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
