Keep Wearing Wedding Band? [Thread #9]

[ForGump]

Coly, thanks. Warm thoughts from all my friends here keep me from entirely losing my faith in humanity.

I've been doing OK. I've just been deliberately pushing away all the sad thoughts, and have been successful at it so far. Been cordial w/ my ex, and we've had many interactions. Fed her some cake as well (helped her w/ stuff) -- but I see it as just being me, I'm not trying to get something out of it. At this point, I'm just trying to move on by setting up my own house and my life, and not DB.

The real big test (?) will be if/when I see my ex with someone else. I think that will hurt. So maybe I do have some work to do, to detach and move on with my life further.

I've been rather enjoying setting up my own house, although the finances are a bit worrisome. My kids are handling the two-house situation quite well so far, although the younger one is often missing the other parent. I have chosen not to dwell on it, and just push on. I realize it's sad but at this point there is nothing I can do, but to just acknowledge the sadness (of missing the other parent), and try to move on to some activity that will make us both happier.

My ex, who had been a SAHM all our married years, is starting a new job but is in a perpetual state of panic because she has poor life skills. She might be able to hang in there while there is spousal support, but ... she's still thinking on a day-by-day basis. I don't see her thinking long-term, big-picture. Sad to watch her struggle, but it's not my place to be her career counselor.

I may post updates here from time to time. I am probably more likely to post in the "Life after the big D" forum.

It's been a long, and sometimes wild ride. Thank you to all of you who have posted in my thread. I consider all of you friends. I wish you all the best. Truly.