I am not sure wether to give her space or what. I tried asking for marriage counseling and all and she refused . I been going to individual counseling and they told to me to just keep it about the children for now and say nothing else, like a "180". It's so hard because I'm lonely and I really miss my wife
Space is the only thing you can give her, honestly. The IC was right - its all about the kids, and you, now. A good friend told me this a long time ago: she is on her own road and, unfortunately, her road doesn't have room for you...just her. You can leave room for her on your own road - whether she joins you or not is totally up to her.
Remember the butterfly analogy? Think of your wife/marriage as a butterfly in your hand. What happens if you squeeze a real butterfly? It kills it, right? So, the only option is to open your hand and let it fly away. If she so chooses to alight in your hand again, then she will. If she doesn't, then there you go.
We've all been there, my friend. All of us. And we are here for you. Make this time about you and your kids. Work on being the best you that you can. What branch, sir? Navy here.
I am a Navy Corpsman, 17 years. I appreciate your analogy and advice. It's just super tough
