FMF...military spouse here. How long have you been married?
Many military couples seem to marry very young and after a number of years together get bored and start wondering what they missed out on. This may not be the case with your W, but it's a common scenario. Either way, if you're willing to wait out her 'adventures in single life', you might find her wanting to return to the family after she's gotten it all out of her system. The big thing to remember is there are no quick and easy fixes. We all want these issues to just go away and have life back the way it used to be, but it never happens that way. Buckle up for the long haul and expect it to take time. She seems like a different person because she is. If she finds her way back to you, it will be in her own time when she has dealt with her own issues. The best you can hope for in the meanwhile is to not make things worse so the door to reconciliation might remain open. Don't push...don't pursue. Use the DB techniques you'll learn here to make yourself into a better man, husband and father. Most of all, post! post! post! There are are great people here to support and advise you.