It's happening

[coffee_]

Just a quick check in.
The divorce is final as of Feb 23 the day after my birthday, which can be good and bad. The final day was a bit anti climactic, I have been separated and out of the house in total for almost a year.
On the 23rd I stopped into court, was swarn in answered a bunch of questions and the judge stamped the paper making it law. I find it interesting that it is more difficult to divorce than get married, perhaps it there should be just as much hoops to jumpo through so it makes us really think about it.

I have been doing really well, but have recently had a backslide of emotions. She continues to treat me like dirt, but pretend that she is the nicest person in the world. I have lost my house, my life as I knew it, dogs, friends, lifestyle...everything. And she could care less, making it my fault because I filed. She has decided to file taxes married but separate which will likely make it so I will have to pay a good amount, I have no down payment on a house, live in an apartment. One of my favorite past times was to chilax in the shop, I have had a shop for 20 years...no shop now. This was an activity that my son and I enjoyed so now that he is with me 50% of the time, when the weather is bad he is super bored. I know its not my job to entertain him but I like him to be comfortable. The one year 'anniversaries" of events are starting to roll in, today is one of them. A year ago today I was happily married, visiting my wife at her work function enjoying each others company. Today was the day she was caught in a big lie...and it really just slid downhill from there, quickly. I have to deal with these emotions on my own, I have a girlfriend that I really enjoy being around, we are in constant contact and it is quite nice. However I don't want to subject her to my past baggage so I just hold it all in.
I get 4 free counseling apointments a year, I think today I will make an apointment, it cant hurt I guess.