Zues, I'm sorry you received that message - it must have been tough to read and it is a measure of your progress that you can manage to not react, and post here and reflect on everything before you respond.

I agree that you may not feel you can let this pass without a response and if you do respond, I would try and remove the emotion from it and do so from your best self.

WRT to attending your S's event - if we removed the emotion, might that look something like - yes I was sorry not to have been able to go too and I will of course attend whenever I am able.

WRT to the taxes - I don't know, is there anything to say actually? The financial situation just 'is'....From what you have posted, it doesn't sound as though your XW has ever really felt the pinch and perhaps she is now? But she did make the choices she made and is now living them...

WRT to the uppers - You may want to let her know that you wouldn't want her to think something that isn't the case. And let her know that you did once take them to get through an event, many years ago and it was just that one time..of course she may not choose to believe this...but that's up to her..

I know I would really feel it added insult to injury if my XH posted in a similar vein to me - given all circumstances - but I do also think it shows an attachment to the situation and a wish to pass off responsibility - ie: I'm not responsible for the state of my life, you are..

All in all, not a great place or state of mind to be in..

Hope this helps a little anyway Zues and take care xx

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus