MLC? Maybe you can tell me...

[SBJ]

Karen...I think that our kids will always push the boundaries just to see how far they can push. That doesn't change when our situations turn to separation. My W was always the disciplinarian, but since she has moved out, I have turned up the heat. For a while things slid, but at a certain point, things just click inside you and you realize that it is all on you now. My W and I shared all of the responsibilities really well, or so I thought, but again...now things are all on my shoulders at "my" house.

The kids know what dad expects and it is done...for the most part. At 19, 14, and 10 things do sometimes slide, but it doesn't take much to get back on track. My D14 and my W are like best friends now, so I don't know exactly what type of dynamic is there when they are at her place, but my W seems more in line with a teenager now than a 43 yo mother of 3. I miss the woman that is now gone, and I hope one day she returns, but it is painfully obvious that she has disappeared for at the moment.

I don't think you have to or should you ask her who she blames...it will all come out eventually. I'm not an expert by any means, but I simply told my kids that I didn't agree with what is going on, but that I loved them, I loved their mother, and God will get us thru this. They know we both love them, but I'm sure in their growing minds there are questions that only can be answered thru time.