WAS vs MLC..not sure it really makes a difference

[skyhigh]

Stop the mind reading, the best way to know what he wants is to talk to him.

So text him to set up a date where you are available (keep it simple), make sure you are not too exhausted at that time. Keep your expectations very low or better to none.

Get ready mentally, reread the thread on Detachment, and whatever he is going to say, keep your calm (talk to yourself mentally), don't spew, don't using any offensive words at all, keep control of yourself, don't ask him any personal questions, let him doing the talking, don't try to advance or talk about issues that's not the time for it and anyway he won't answer you most probably and will get upset.

Basically, let him talk and just listen while trying to control your mind and validate, validate doesn't mean you agree it means that you show some kind of empathy, it will help him to keep talking.

By doing that it doesn't mean you are acting as a doormat, not at all, it means you are trying to keep that door open for other future conversations.

Even if he says something offensive, stay calm, MLCers like to push our buttons a lot, so don't play any of his games if he tries any of them. Keep in mind what used to set you up and don't fall for it this time.

That's the time to show him that you changed, that's you are not the overreactive person you used to be and also somehow you are detached now, that's you are moving with your life, congratulations for the new car. You want him to become the pursuer if that's want you would like.

Dealing with a MLCer is like a game, you need to have a strategy.

Believe in yourself, show him what he is missing. Good luck!