Wsh,

These two things stand out to me the most from Kaizen's reply:

Quote:
said I was weak physically and mentally and whiny


and

Quote:
she said I didn't want her to think much of herself


There is no easy way to say this, so I'll just leave it here - the first speaks volumes; and the second part seems to be very controlling in nature.

I would say that if you can get the first part under control and re-gain that physical/mental strength, then maybe you can get to where you need to be - for whatever new relationships you will enter in the future. Right now, the unfortunate truth is that there isn't much respect.

For her to say that you didn't want her to think much of herself screams controlling - why would she say that? You were mean about her appearance - did you talk down on her or call her names? If so, then that suggests a whole different ballgame.

Take care of yourself first, Wsh. You have a long road ahead of you. We are here for you, my friend.

There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.