It seems like, by far, most people here weren't successful (at least not before divorce) in reconciling. I know DB is more about knowing what doesn't work, according to MWD, but how do we know that DB works? It would need to have a higher success rate than the total percentage of people that successfully saved their marriages, including all those that did and all those that didn't use DB techniques, right? The success rate of DBers should be higher than that, right? Do we have statistics that show this?
DB'ing works!
Success can be defined many different ways. I know you are defining it as your marriage is recovered. Sadly not all marriages recover. However I can say that whether your marriage recovers or not you can define success as YOU recovering. If you follow what you learn here YOU will recover.
When people wash up here on our shores their marriages are likely over already. So part of DB is to learn how to fix ourselves and how to build a new marriage/relationship. No matter what you will need to be able to do that in the future. You can only look forward, you can not look backwards and try to change the past. Learn from the past but accept it and keep moving forward.
Those that try to sweep all of this under the rug and run away from it all are doomed to continue to repeat their history over and over until they get it right.
Second marriages fail at an even greater rate than first marriages. How do you beat those statistics.
