It is very scary to me. I do consider this a gift and it is very possible the best thing to happen to our marriage. I have been given a wake up call. He has time to get his priorities figured out. If his priorities don't include me and our son, then at least I can march on with my independence, strength and confidence and be able to take care of my son.
This is one of the scariest, and hardest, things we will ever go through. The fact that he moved out is very concerning and you have been given the gift of time to become the strongest and best love1st that you can be, for both you and your son.
Why did you say "his priorities don't include me and my son?" Has he ever made any inference that his son isn't his priority? He may have left you and the marriage, but not his son...there is a difference.
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I'm lost and need to wrap my head around how I should proceed in allowing my H room and space, but continuing to hold his attention.
I've seen some say that the best thing you can do is just pretend he doesn't exist. Trying to hold his attention is akin to pursuing...honestly, he may even not want you to try. As hard as it is, the best thing you can do is let him be. The butterfly analogy works well here: squeeze too hard and you will kill the butterfly every time...open your hand and let it fly away. If it chooses to return and alight in your open hand, then there is your answer. But, you have to hold you hand open and give it the choice...and trying to hold his attention is more like squeezing that butterfly.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
