I haven't posted in Newcombers much recently as my very high conflict D has left me very low. I like to read all of the threads before I post as otherwise my posts are skewed.
Recently I have been involved with a divorce group centred around distress abuse and control, there are many wonderful dads and husbands in that group.
So, in some sitches where D is started then great L advice is needed, I think yours is one of these. If your L is advising action then follow that advice. Please ensure you look at joint custody, ensure that you have a good home where your boys can come stay with you. Be aware that you may not be able to co parent with WW that it may be you have to parallel parent. Obtain great provisional custody orders as detailed as possible. At all times say cool and stum. Keep your buttons out of reach and don't run down the mother of your children in any way. This is a very crucial time and how you act and think will set the future.
Being this way is very strong and masculine.
You are to look after you and your boys, these precious children need you as the calmer and non wayward parent to be stable and secure. I can see you love your boys and that is a tremendous pleasure and delight to read. For me that shows your priorities and thinking are excellent. I really like this in your sitch and whilst I don't know you I can see this in the writing you have.
Your sitch is well beyond LRT, which is a technique I think is best with an in house sitch. You have GAL which is about growing stronger for yourself and having much to give. For most of us dating is a mistake, a distraction from pain in which we use another to remove pain, without growth then we are taking the problems of an old R into a new one.
Divorce won't mean the end, there are many reconciliations during and after, although it means a new R where you both are healed.
I can see Bippy has given you some great solid advice and doodler (when not skinny dipping) is very practical.
I have the habit of 'adopting' a newbie and I am sad to tell you that means I may keep dropping in on you.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
