So Confused and Conflicted (3)

[WshIKnw]

Come on man, do you hear yourself? You are in no shape for her to come back right now. If she came back right now, you would be like a whipped dog and so smothering because you would be scared to lose her again, that it wouldn't last. You have to be happy with YOU before you can ever make her happy. Did you read those 2 threads I posted for you earlier?

I need to read those. I will open them up to help me remember to read them.

From what I have read, she has treated you like crap over the past few months. Is that really the way you want to live just to be with someone?

You're not getting my threads mixed up with someone else's, are you? How has she treated me like crap? Oh, you mean since she dropped the bomb? I don't want the alien/demon version of her. I want the one of 10 years, that was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. She hasn't constantly been mean to me since BD, just at times, especially early on.

Read those threads!! You have to be strong and confident. You have to be the man of the relationship! You previously mentioned that you were 'underweight, pale, and skinny' and that attractive people aren't any of these. Do you really think having zero self confidence is going to bring her back? He!! No. I will bet you that if you GAL, for real, that you will notice changes in your situation. Get on tinder, bumble or any app to meet people . It's easy. Your wife wants kids, but do you think she wants to have kids with someone who's b@lls are in her purse and someone she had to take care of? I think not. I think you have a good chance in getting your wife back at some point, but you have to make some major changes. If you are this committed to wandering why, analyzing everything, and beating yourself up, you can be committed to doing the things that are actually going to help you and your situation. I know this is probably harsh, but it's the truth. Not trying to bust your chops at all. Do what people on here are telling you and you will be surprised. You Can Do It!!!!!!

I thank you for your encouragement and wisdom. I just wonder why she would be with me to begin with if she didn't like skinny, pale, and somewhat lacking confidence. I have always thought that because she was a strong woman, that she liked those traits in me, because she wanted to wear the pants. But lately, she started complaining about my weaknesses. So unfair, man. I think it was mostly my lack of trying that killed it for her, and lack of attention and interest in her. She can't put up with weakness and such AND someone that isn't trying as hard as they used to.

It's pretty easy to lift weights. What's hard for me is to eat, especially in the mornings.