Newby here . . . (Thread 7)

[JRuss]

Thanks for checking in, FG. I missed your post, and then it went several pages deep (tons of people posting, which is depressing, the constant supply of LBSs), so I'm glad I scrolled down.

I hear you on the bumps in the road. I thought I was a day or two away from being served, tops, and then things slowed down. W suddenly realized she doesn't really understand how any of this works, how child support works (I think she thought she'd get more), and started doing her thing, where she shows SOMETHING is wrong, but doesn't say what it is, and I can either ask repeatedly, wading through 4-5 "nothing" replies before I finally get told what's going on, or I can ignore, at which point she'll usually start some sort of fight. She's basically overwhelmed at how hard it is to get divorced, and she's finally realizing it will hurt her financially. So she's slowed the pace down, wants to talk to some people. She definitely still wants to get divorced, but she's worried she might make a bad deal. I still think I'll be served sometime next week, as I was finally able to talk to her, told her I'd help how I could (main thing I won't do is file or be the plaintiff), etc., and she calmed down a lot.

The kids seem to be doing ok. We are both talking to them regularly, trying to make it all seem normal and not something to fear. What they really don't like (understandably) is Mom and Dad fighting, and we've pretty much stopped all of that.