This used to be easier - and a lot more fun, cont.

[DonH]

I can and do relate with much of what you write Georgiabelle. We also may be somewhat alike. I too am extremely independent and always have been. My mom tells me that from toddler on "I do it myself" was in my vocabulary. While I don't at all think of myself as quirky, I have had at least some people say otherwise. I've never been the guy that people take to or really like right away. Those who get to know me and "get me" tend to love me. Most of my good friends would tell you that - it took a while to understand me, but once they did... Perhaps that is quirky? I just don't see it like I do with others.

I am also picky but not in a purposeful way, if that makes sense. I just like what I like and I know it when I see it. It may not even be the same from person to person. Finally, again like you, I also am not attracted to most people. Do I look like a f'kin people person? and have a T-Shirt that says just that, given to me by a friend who does get me.

So put that altogether and... I am pretty sure I've written my 50/40/10 assessment on here but it bares repeating. Talking in general terms with all people - not just women who could be potential dates - 50% of those I meet I would rather not even talk to. I don't get their jokes, I don't get their small talk. We have little in common. I don't try to feel this way - I just do. 40% I will get to know, don't mind doing things now and then but would not want to go on vacation with them for example - other than in a large group. Then there are the 10% ers. If you are a 10% er I will do just about anything for you. I enjoy doing things, will stay in contact, you are the first person I'll gravitate to in a room. I have very diverse friends but only a few close ones. It's again been this way much of my life. There are people I just love to do things with but they are the 10% which means there are not a lot to chose from. Many are married, some still have kids or now getting grand kids, etc. So I don't have a huge circle - just a good one.

I hate going places by myself unless I have a reason to be there. Show up at a bar or a meeting by myself? Id' rather go to the dentist - unless I'm giging at the bar, running the meeting or at least speaking at it, etc. Otherwise I much rather have a friend with me. So that's one thing I'd rather not do by myself. Projects, etc. even exploring fun cool places - like say Washington DC I'd sort of rather do by myself - just not group tours, etc. Cruises, bars, social things, I hate doing by myself and want someone with me.

Does this make me quirky?

So what do I want? Well if I could just order her up, she would be pretty independent, not need me but want to be with me. Casual would be fine, committed but not so intertwined that I'm obligated or expected to be there all the time would be great. I'd be fine with "girlfirend" I never say never but can't at all see myself getting married again. What is the point at my age? I could certainly see living with someone but that would likely be the farthest step I'd go. I want someone who is honest and that I can trust. That's nearly impossible to find right there. I find people are not even honest with themselves so how can they be honest with me? I can take pretty much any honesty but cannot stand dishonesty. I also have a GREAT BS detector so I typically can tell when I'm being lied to. I only have truly 2.5 "deal breakers. Smoking is one - just can't, cannot, will not, just no!!! Dishonesty. You may get one pass with me but lie to me and it's likely over. And then the 1/2 is large tattoos. Whatever - that may be pretty lame but just can't hold hands with someone with a snake on her arm or coming off her boobs or a tramp stamp above her butt. Thing is, I'll bet you dollars to donuts she won't meet the other stuff anyhow. A little this or that in otherwise somewhat hidden places, ankles, yeah, that's fine. Not for me, would not suggest it but not a deal breaker and have dated women like this.

Does that answer it? Beyond that, the type of person - intelligence, confidence, educated (usually but common sense and intelligence are more important). Reasonably good looking and in decent shape. I have no problems and actually some attraction to what some call "thick" but rolls, sorry. Not huge on over-done girly girls or plastic surgery either. The more natural look attracts me more. That said, the looks are more negotiable than the person and personality. It won't matter what she looks like if we can't hold a conversation, she is klingy, filled with drama, etc. It just won't matter. On the other hand if she fits emotionally, it won't matter near as much what she looks like.

For whatever reason I've always fit with those younger than me. My exW was only one year younger - nearly to the day. But many GF and dates were and still have been younger - though not all. I don't look for it, it just sort of happens. I remember having a 20 year old GF when I was 27. We only dated through the summer until she returned to college. Oddly enough we reconnected and dated for 9 months 3.5 years ago until she decided to remarry her ex husband. They had 3 kids and I just backed out - was the right thing to do. At this point I can't see being with someone younger than 40 so when I say younger - it still is within reason. Actually 45 is more accurate but it's again more who the person is.

Does that help? If not, what did I miss? Ask and I shall tell.