On the long and lonely road - trying to own it

[Dawgs]

Hey 2016!

During his time with S3, he sends me an email detailing the offer he is making re divorce settlement, which is not favourable to me. I was cut deeply when I looked at it - how can someone you loved so much and said

they loved you as much care so little for you now they have no interest in how you fare from hereon, and don't care if you struggle financially for the rest of your life? It's mind boggling to me. I didn't reply to the email.

You did the right thing by not replying - it's not worth the fighting. That's what the lawyers are for. I have often wondered myself how they can do those things to us after professing they love us and will be there forever. Ugh.

Over the next 3 days, he sends me pictures of our son and a couple of videos. No messages, just pictures. I know why he's doing it - it's because he's trying to keep me sweet and he thinks this will help him in the long run when the custody issue raises its head - I've seen an email to his mother saying as much. I respond just once, to say 'Thank you'.

Mine does the same thing - photos but no text. Maybe he is doing like mine - just sending pictures because you are his mom. Who knows. Don't read into it.

When I was telling a friend yesterday about this and how amazed I was by his insensitivity, she explained that in his mind he's moved on so far ahead that he's beyond pain and doesn't expect me to feel any pain either, which is why doing things like being all friendly and wanting to co-host stuff doesn't faze him - it doesn't occur to him any longer there's any difficulty because he thinks I'm in the same place that he is, which is Happyville.

I agree with your friend's statement. Moved on. That's the unfortunate truth that so many on here either do not want to see or are blind - that they have moved on...permanently.

As for the birthday, the old me would have said no... but he is the father. 2016, if you think you can handle it (and I believe you can), then I'd say "sure." Just let him know there will be no drama.

Does he really think he's done nothing wrong and that I'm ok with it just because I'm not hideous to him every time I've seen him? I've been trying to be the cordial neighbour but his response to me yesterday seems to indicate to me he thinks I'm content with the situation, no complaints about being left for another woman. Is it really possible he thinks that? Am I going mad?

He thinks that. There is nothing you can do, sadly. He's on his own road, you know?