Keep Wearing Wedding Band? [Thread #9]

[ForGump]

There is nothing as particularly demoralizing as discussing or negotiating the division of major assets. Not this cup or that blender. Major assets. Simply by engaging in it, you enter into a relationship of you-vs-an-other. You are no longer mates. You are no longer partners. It's your interests vs. hers. Just by engaging in it, you dismantle the bond you shared for years. It feels dehumanizing to me.

I've also been thinking about cake vs. cake. There is practical cake and emotional cake. By practical cake, I mean the material and financial benefits, or some other way in which you are provided a practical benefit. Then there is emotional cake, where you feel comforted, safe, wanted, desired.

It seems to me, when a WW loses her practical cake, it's not likely to wake her up from her fog. It may just intensify it by increasing her sense of resentment toward you.

It's when a WW loses her emotional cake, that there is a small, a very small chance, that she'd realize what she's losing in a partner.

This is the kind of thing I think about when I run at night.