Same Sitch. New Approach. Motivated. Feeling Good.

[Chris73]

Thanks PsySara. I have to admit that I've had more false starts than I can count. But this time it seems to be really sticking. My mistakes have been fewer and less detrimental to my progress. Sometimes I feel like I'm up against a deadline... my W mentioned that she wanted to wait until after the school year was over before we made any more changes to our relationship. But deep down I know that I can't control whether or not she decides to file when the summer comes.

I do see changes in my W's behavior. Not necessarily related to her feeling differently about me, but I have to believe that the change that I have made is affecting her at least a little bit. One thing I've noticed is that she's starting to calm down a little bit with the whole "girls gone wild" thing. Coming home a little earlier. Not drinking as much (thank God!). Complaining to me about how some of her girlfriends are a little too out of control.

She even suspended her Facebook account today because "it was too much" and she was "spending too much time on it". Now of course there are plenty of OTHER reasons why she would suspend her Facebook account and don't think I haven't obsessed over them (like I do with everything else). But I'm finding out these days that obsessing about things I can't change only distracts me from my goals. So I try to snap myself out of it as often as I can.

Last night after work my W went to a painting class with friends that I consider a bit more stable (although, what the h3ll do I know right?). She got home at a reasonable hour, came downstairs to show me what she painted and then said goodnight. None of these actions were necessary, but I'm encouraged that she's reacting somewhat positively to my efforts to re-connect.

Today will be a bit odd considering it's Hallmark holiday about love. But she told me she was cooking and invited me to come home in time to join her and the kids. I had the kids make her Valentine's Day cards, and there's one from me too but it's not romantic in the least, just funny. The one thing I can always count on is that I can make her laugh.

So we'll see how that goes tonight. I'm looking forward to a nice sit-down meal with the family.