I know that ultimately it is up to me when I am ready to give up on this. I know that everyone just wants me to be happy and not in pain anymore. I think they feel that if I just get the D then my pain will be gone.....but it wont. I agree that he doesn't deserve me and that is also one thing that keeps coming into my head about filing or not.
I filed in the past and to be honest I did that to try to scare him and for him to see what he was going to be missing out on. He didn't sign papers for me to follow through with it so I had it dismissed. I have since told him that if he wants a D then he can file for it.
I do think about if he is using me for monetary purposes, and for keeping his credit in good standing by continuing to pay the mortgage. I really hate to think that he has turned into that heartless of a man and would do something like that. But this is the same man that I was married to for 10 years who cheated on me and then turned his back on me and abandoned our marriage, and has not seen me since November and has not spoken to me since the first of January.
I wanted to send him a text to see if he could help me with the dogs as I am working the next 5 out of 6 days (12 hour shifts). I also wanted to apologize for the last text I sent him. Any thoughts on that anyone?
