Quote: I ask him to snuggle when he cools off. So, he does.
He must not be totally withdrawn, he was willing to meet your needs when asked.
Quote: He says he doesn't know what he needs and that he can't talk right now b/c he's got to go to work.
My H says similar stuff--when I ask him what will help, he'll say "I don't know." Don't let it bug you too much. Just try different things to see what works... Try giving him space. Or maybe leaving him a simple ILY note, and nothing more. Then just monitor, and learn what things help him feel more relaxed. There's no better way to figure it out other than to try stuff. Sooner or later, you'll learn what approaches work better.
Quote: I am somewhat paranoid about what is going on in his head right now.
That's probably part of the problem. If you're feeling paranoid, you're probably doing something, even if you don't realize it, to put pressure on him. He already told you he was committed!
Quote: But I also told him the other day that if he continues to be distant, etc., that no, things will not change.
Maybe he's still distant because you told him this...?
When your H withdraws, try going out and doing your own thing. I can just see the low PMA, and that doesn't help. Smile.
