I have spoken to my lawyer on this and he said that I would have to prove her unfit, which is very hard to do. Since she "passed" the military's psych evals, I may not be able to. He said that unfortunately, due to the laws, that there isn't anything I can do until she commits the act.
Jeep,
I know my XW truly loves our sons and I don't think she'd knowingly allow them to get in harm's way. Unfortunately, because of her dissociation, she has the potential to "zone out" and that happens when she perceives herself to be in a dangerous situation. Zoning out was a conditioned response as an escape from her childhood abuse.
I talked to my lawyer and mediator about the OM, and they more-or-less said the same thing that your lawyer said; they couldn't do anything unless there was a criminal history. I kept pressing the issue and that's when they decided that the "special" clause could be included in the mediation agreement.
According to my lawyer, all the boys have to do is say that they want to stay with me and that's all that has to be done in the short term. In other words, if my wife calls the cops because my sons are with me, of their own volition, then everything is good, they can stay with me. I keep a copy of the mediation agreement in my car and another copy in my house. That one paragraph in the agreement is a wonderful thing.
