Thanks Sandi
Guess it would be a deal breaker unless there was an adult conversation to thrash out the reasons why. Strangely enough she confirmed one personality trait in one of her texts to him as she stated she was anti-adultery full stop on religious grounds (which is also why I thought our physical relationship was in "my" compartment).

Me 55, W 50
D 8
M 20
T 27
MIL w/ us
BD 01/02/17
workplace A (12/09/16, EA -> PA)
OM senior manager, long term W, child 14
now: limbo (my choice)

"Don't care what you may do, we got that attitude!" - Bad Brains