Hey, Karen. Sorry you're here but glad you found the forum. For NC one usually initiates communication only when absolutely necessary and then brief, to the point, but in a light and friendly manner (neighborly). If he reaches out to you, it is ok to respond; but unless it is an emergency or something that needs to be addressed right away (can you pick up child from school...can't find car keys), your response time can be at your leisure or even not at all.
There are variables to NC, though. For instance, one of my 180's was to be a better listener. I'm NC, but if XH calls (usually about something else), I will allow him to vent or talk, with me just listening and validating. Trying to be the lighthouse. We are D (BD to D in just over a year), but I believe he is in MLC and am (at the moment) standing. Its tough at times, but GAL and moving forward really do help.
I wouldn't respond to the texts or you could just say "ok"...they seem to just be to let you know he's coming by. My XH would knock and shout "hellooo?" as if he were entering a friend's house instead of his own house where his wife of 26 years lived. He tried to take care of me and check on me even after he left. "Nice guys"...(SMDH).
Keep posting, read the threads that are suggested, and get busy remembering who you were or finding who you are now. Live authentically and hug those kiddos tight. Buckle up...this road can get rough, but it has some great surprises if you make room and keep your eyes open.
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
