When we dated before we married we had ups and downs.. general struggles and things I would not change on that she wanted and things that I did, she had the same. I was not the most mature then and did not have a good head on my shoulders which caused issues but we worked through them so I thought.. I know of a few idiotic moments I had back then that just can't be fixed or forgotten that went with my maturity... I ended up joining the military which fixed a lot of my maturity and some of the issues that we had between each other of priorities.. We were engaged by now and talking of M in a year, however I was presented with deployment papers which caused us to push them up rather quickly once graduating basic. I deployed for 15 months in our first year of marriage.. we ended up buying our first home together, and other things to go along with new marriages.. everything seemed to be good now. We would still have spats every now and then but generally worked through them. We were keeping busy with our home and repairs as well as starting to want babies..which didn't happen then.. That caused a lot of stress on the both of us. I look back now and see how much of an idiot I was then on how I reacted to it.. I was more concerned with myself it feels like.. I tried to be supportive and sympathetic but never grieved over it or really helped her with grieving. We did treatments and tests and she was essentially put through hell and I did not do my best at being a strong shoulder for everything looking back. Hindsight..
