It's been awhile so I thought I'd journal tonight.
The kids were sick again, one right after the other. I have to think all this stress has their immune systems weakened too. We just can't get healthy, it's crazy. All better not though. W asked me to bring a couple things to her apartment when D was sick and said she'd meet me outside. Right before I got there she texted saying I could come in if I wanted. I texted from my car when I got there and she came out. Since then she has made a few comments about me not coming in to see her place.
I had D at my office when she was sick during W's week and I took her out to W's work at the end of the day. When I was there W was telling me how busy she was and what a mess her desk was and wanted to show me. I've been validating her work but slipped as soon as I went in because there was a pack of cigarettes laying on it. I instinctively brought it up and she denied it and told me they were her boss's and she kept them because she was hiding it. I know I shouldn't have said anything but why does she care enough to lie about it?
The week before the last W was over Friday. I told her I was going to take the kids to the movies and she was welcome to come along. She said she would like to but was hurting so bad she didn't think she could and suggested we rent a movie at home. She came over Sunday evening we had dinner and a nice movie night.
Last week I had to leave town. W stayed at my house with the kids all week. She had people over two nights I was gone to look at puppies and had arranged for two ladies and kids to come over Friday afternoon when school was out.
Friday is a day off for her and she texted me in the morning because the batteries in the thermostat died and the house was freezing. I had to suggest several things for her to take batteries out of because she couldn't find any. It was strange she couldn't look around and find something herself. After she texted a bunch. I didn't respond right away at first and she got an attitude. I told her I wasn't ignoring her but couldn't text back right away. She texted me all morning, very friendly and joking.
I got back right before school got out so I was here for everyone coming over. It wasn't awkward (I talk to them picking kids up from school, bday parties, etc.) but have to wonder what they think of the situation. They both know W tried to move away w/kids this summer. After they left W stayed until almost bedtime and we had a few glasses of wine and takeout. We talked the whole time she was here. At one point she said "you're going to be mad at me" and when I asked why she told me MLC friend bought them front row/meet and greet concert tickets. I asked why would I be mad and she said "I figured you'd be jealous since you've never seen them in concert." I just said yeah, it sounds cool so I wasn't poo pooing her. So strange, I will go to concerts sometimes but haven't been in ages (I don't like crowds)and this was a complaint at BD. Before leaving she suggested the kids stay with me since I was gone all week even though it was her week and they are with me Saturdays. She also told me she went to the Dr. and started a birth control/hormone that will hopefully help her with her problem. I was happy to hear that, she is in debilitating pain a quarter of her life and I'm quite certain it's part of her depression. I validated her finally doing something about it and she started talking about being old again. Ugh...
W keeps making comments about not having this or that or money. I don't validate, just listen. It's her choice, she's running all over the place taking trips, new clothes, etc.
I noticed a few things from while she was here over the week. She slept in my bed instead of the couch but I think she slept on top of the covers. I could also tell that she went through some of my things. Why would she care to snoop around?
Oh, and another weird one. Almost every time she is over she shows me facebook pics of her old boss (body builder) who posts nearly naked pics of herself. IDK why, I told her she is way past the point of being attractively fit and W agreed but still has to show me all of the time for some reason.
Saturday she came over and was very cold. She had texted just before and seemed okay but pretty much ignored me while she was here. She was on her phone/facebook most of the time. Didn't even look at the pups. I had just done D's nails and I did sit a lighter I found on the deck on the counter but didn't say a word about it. I noticed she pocketed it before leaving. Maybe one of those things made her mad, otherwise IDK why she acted that way.
D asked to do a cheerleading afterschool camp this week and before leaving I told D to be sure to wear sneakers Monday. W turned to me and said "Do you think I'm f'ing stupid?" I was taken back but just told her I wasn't talking to you and of course I don't think your stupid, I was just having a conversation with D. I see more projection of her parents on me with that comment. She used to tell me they would tell her she was stupid as a child, so sad.
Well enough about W, lol. I know my post above focuses on her but I'm still working on getting my expectations to zero while not giving up. It's hard not to notice all these things with so much contact. Trying to take a step back and see things for what they are instead of getting caught up in things.
