Returning Customer

[2chiquitos]

Yesterday SO brought up money talk using the (after we separate) undertone. Those conversations are very difficult for me to hear. They catch me by surprise. They come when we are having a nice conversation about our day.

I know now he does it with such ease because our talk is going great. Hes thinking, oh she can handle this. Look at how well we're getting along.

He must've tried reading my expression. I said nothing but froze. He backpedaled and said, oh right we agreed "you" spend the tax money on rebuilding the porch.

I thank God I was able to recover from that last night after going to a mtg. Last week it took me the entire weekend to get past it.

I keep thinking, I dont want to separate but I dont want our old relationship back. I pray that God help me to let him do his work. I pray that I dont meddle in Gods plan for us.