Same Sitch. New Approach. Motivated. Feeling Good.

[Chris73]

This is my thinking. You cant file for divorce as a means of trying to get her to 'do' or 'feel' something. You arent making 'her' decision. You file for divorce because you feel like your boundaries are crossed and you wont accept being in the position in which you are put. Or theres some financial or other kind of protection that you need from it.

Im glad you didnt file or even threaten to file. Im not sure it would have actually been of any benefit for you.

Exactly Kaizen. This is a great point.

And in addition to this, the idea of divorcing, splitting up the family, and co-parenting from separate locations goes against my moral value system. I made a commitment to my W that I don't intend to break. Sure, at times I wasn't a good husband. And I accept 50% of the responsibility for the deterioration of our marriage.

But this commitment to raise my kids in the best environment possible, break the cycle of broken marriage that our parents passed on to us, and love my W for better or worse is more important to me than the pain I'm experiencing now because of her behavior.