She is still playing games. Even the bit about her panicing b/c you left without saying good-bye.
Quote:


"I know I have really f*cked you over, and hurt you." While it wasn't an apology, or real full blown remorse, it felt like a little remorse.


You were wanting her to feel remorse. She made a statement. How did you respond?


Quote:
While I know the battle is far from over, I did have the thought that maybe the fog is starting to thin in at least one spot. At least she (maybe) recognizes what she is doing is wrong...I am going to try real hard not to backslide, and keep working the program.


She has always known it was wrong! That is why she lies about it.


Quote:
She will not be let off the hook until full transparency is achieved, no contact can be verified, and we go to counselin
g.

Yeah? B/c that is what she is trying to do........Get off the hook in her own way....Not yours. So, what do you plan to do in the meantime?

Has there been a transparency plan agreed upon (I forget). Even discussed? Has she asked what it would take to fix things? I feel you are jumping ahead of yourself, and nothing has changed in her. The first thing is for her to agree to stop the affair and to no contact with OM ever again. Until then, nothing is going to work b/c she will continue playing games.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!