I see you are still on WAW's emotional roller coaster. She has been unwavering in where your R is headed from what I read. Tell me if I am wrong. You have little choice but to accept it for now since you have already agreed to the S. You are seen as an obstacle to her fantasy coming true.
I agree with the advise that you need not accept her choices about OM. You can't do anything about them, but accept them? No, I don't think so.
From what I read, you spend too much time dwelling on her and too little time dwelling on fixing/strengthening Gordie. I think it is great that you spend time with your kids. Perhaps you should take them on a trip and build those relationships which also frees WAW to be with OM or whatever else she wants to do. Give the fire of her dream some oxygen so that it can burn good and hot.
She seems hell bent on flaming your marriage. While you need to be respectful, I do not believe you need to be luvy duvy. I certainly would not have sex with her at this point. However, my personal preference is to avoid STD's at all cost.
As you dig deeper into Gordie, you will find there is more than enough to keep you busy. Things that need real work. Your R's with your kids are gonna need a bunch of quality time. That means quantity as well.
